George Clooney, President of the United States

I've been feeling really slighted lately. I want to be the news reporter in class. I'm not sure why I don't get picked, but I mentioned to my Mom that I think it could be because I'm not a fast thinker. She said that she thinks I'm one of the fastest thinkers she ever met. I told her to ask me test questions and it went like this:

Mommy: What is 1+1?

Me: 2, quick ask me my next one

Mommy: Who is our current president?

Me: Easy, George....ummm.......ummm.....Clooney!

That wasn't the right answer. I realized before my mom said that it was George Bush that George Clooney wasn't the current president, he was our first president. Oops! An easy mistake that anyone could've made, right?

Re- Introducing....Matilda!!!

I know, I know, its been way too long. Mommy finally took a proper picture of me to share with all of you. Did you all realize how beautiful I was? I didn't think so. I really wanted a nice picture of myself to put on here, but I also desperately wanted these disguise glasses at CVS. My mom said that I could get them for my picture on this blog. At first, I didn't really want to do it, because let's face it, I was going to look heinous. Heinous, by the way, is a word I just adore. Anyway, I finally agreed if that was the only way to get the disguise. I guess my mom is really afraid of weirdos or something, because she won't let anyone see the real me. Sadly enough, these brows aren't too far off from the real thing. I do have a very bad unibrow, and I'm a very hairy person. My legs are so hairy. I never, ever, liked them; and I never will. I want my mom to shave them, but truthfully, she's not that good with keeping up on her own, so there isn't much of a chance she's going to shave a kindergartener. She has very bad pickies on her legs a lot!

There's so much for me to catch you all up on. I started a karate class last week. I got a white belt to start with. I've only had one class so far, so I haven't learned how to karate chop anyone yet. I learned how to keep my balance and to hit a punching bag. I don't think either of the teachers have any experience with karate. It's at my community center, and its taught by two people that work there, but they aren't karate people. Good thing its free. I had on a brown sweatsuit with Ugg boots, and I tied my white belt around the whole thing, so it really didn't look that official. They only gave you a belt, not that real karate outfit that I've seen on other kids. Like I said, it's free. This week I'm going to try and wear something that matches the belt better. I did tell my mom to never let the belt hit the ground, because I have to respect it. I don't even know what that means, but thats what the teachers said. My mom said that the belt must follow the same rules as the American flag or something. She thought that sounded a little strange, but she never took karate herself, even though she sometimes pretends to know certain moves.

My gymnastics classes are going very well. You should see my cartwheel. It's sensational. I am also getting better at handstands. I spend most of my free time doing cartwheels and kicking my legs up wherever I can. I'm addicted to this gymnastics thing!

I went to see a great movie on Friday night. It was called Beverly Hills Chihuahua. If you click on that, you can go to the official website. I really loved it. My older sister thought it was horrible, but not me. It was about a dog that got lost in India, and other dogs helped her find her owners. My mom is saying that the dog, Chloe, got lost in Mexico, but she didn't see it, so I don't know how she knows. It looked like India to me. There were a lot of Indian people around when that dog got lost. My mom thinks they were Mexican people, but I told her, I think they are the same kind of people, anyway, so who really cares.

I also picked out my Halloween costume, too, I'm going to be a beautiful fairy. I would say that I'll have my mom put a picture on here of me on Halloween, but let's face it, I won't be beautiful, because I'll be a fairy with that disguise on again. I'll look like a real nut.

Hope someone is still reading this. Post some comments. I have to go to bed now. --Matilda

Missing in Action

I know, long time no blog. I have just been so busy. I started getting homework last week, and it's really cramping my style. I'm trying to get the whole week's worth done on Monday night, but it isn't always possible. My dad wanted me to write about the birthday party I went to on Saturday night. I told him, "No. Blogs aren't for writing about parties, they're for excitement." I hope this blog brings us all some excitement.



I wanted to do another movie review. Tonight, I watched "Barbie & The Diamond Castle." It was so great. I started to watch it at my cousin's 5th birthday party, but had to leave about 10 minutes after it started. I begged my mother and father to rent it for me, so they did tonight. I was on cloud 9 when I saw that the movie was available in Red Box at our supermarket. The little bit of the movie that I saw on Saturday was ruined by my mom, anyway. She insisted on singing the opening song and embarassing everyone. My cousin started crying because all she ever wanted was to see that movie, and my mom ruined it for her. I was really mad at her. Anyhow, back to the movie. I would recommend it to boys and girls. There are two princes in the movie, so I don't think boys would be uncomfortable watching it. Invite a lot of people over, if you want, and have some snacks to eat with the movie, like pepperoni.



Tonight my mom asked me who I'm voting for. I told her that I am voting for Obama. I heard that his little girls like Hannah Montana, and we really have something in common, that means. I told her that the other guy looks way too old for the job. I also mentioned that I felt bad that the current man, Mr. Bush, was about to die. She said she hadn't heard that he was about to die. I asked her why would we be picking someone new then? Mom said everyone deserves a turn. But I don't think McCain should get a turn. Why would he care if he gets a turn at his age? He probably just wants to take naps.

More tomorrow.......-Matilda Wormwood

Kindergarten Contortionist

I haven't had much time to blog this week. Kindergarten is just keeping me so busy! I'm exhausted by the time I get home and have had numerous meltdowns at night. What's a girl to do? I haven't had to much in the way of homework, just a couple of fun projects that my mom helped me complete. In spite of that, I've barely had any time to watch television this week. I'm a television junkie, people! It's a big deal if I'm not keeping up with my shows.

I've gotten in trouble a couple of times this week. Walking to school, a friend and I opened our umbrellas as we walked along, and our teacher hollered at us to close them. It was her idea, so I wasn't that embarassed when we got scolded. Plus, it wasn't even raining, so I didn't mind closing it up. Today, I grabbed scissors out of a girl's hand and had to sit in time out for 5 minutes. I wasn't that embarassed about that, either, because she isn't a friend of mine.

Went to gymnastics class again today for class #2. I have a feeling I'm going to get pretty good at this. I'm very flexible. I'm practically made of rubber. My mom thinks I'm going to get a job in a sideshow. That would be fun. I'm almost like the girl in the picture above.

Tonight, my mom said she wishes she had more money. I told her I'm going to buy her some. See ya later! I'm going upstairs for my bath and to listen to a book on CD. Maybe I'll do a review on it for you guys--Matilda

First Day of School

I went off to school this morning like I've been doing it my whole life. Here I am, getting ready to walk into school. I'll let you know how it goes....

Ladybug Undies

Well, the weekend is over and with it, my carefree life. Tomorrow morning I become an official school student. A kindergartener, with homework, phys ed, school lunches, etc. I'm wearing a green dress with three apples across the front. Maybe I can talk my mom into taking a picture. Stay tuned for details about my day...

Tonight after my bath I picked out underwear with ladybugs all over them. I said to my mom, "I'm picking these because ladybugs bring good luck. If you have ladybugs all over your butt, you will definitely have good luck. Plus, it might help you to not wet your pants at school." My mom looked a little worried when I said that.

Sarah Palin

Mommy asked me to look at this picture of this woman named Sarah Palin. She asked me what I thought of her. I said, "She looks weird. Maybe we could fix her up with a makeover." I came up with the picture next to this with my Mom's help. I told her what to do. I think I had great ideas. Mommy said she is running for vice-president. I don't even know what Mommy's talking about. Mommy also said she has 5 kids, and their names are Track, Bristol, Willow, Piper, and Trig. The only name I like is Sarah Palin's name. I have one word to say about those kid's names: weird.

I started gymnastics today. It was great. The teacher was so nice. She was so pretty. It was a serious gymnastics class, and I got very hot, and very sweaty. The leotard was picking me, because it was way too small on me. But I still managed to have a great time. I want my mom to buy me a red, white, and blue leotard, which they sell at the gymnastics center. For now, it looks like she'll just have me squeezing into my old one.

I also got some great news today! I got a call from my new school, where I'll be starting kindergarten next week. I got the teacher I was hoping I would get. She seems really, really nice, and she made me count teddy bears at my testing, which I was thrilled about.

Well, I have to get ready for bed. I have kindergarten orientation tomorrow, so I have to get my beauty sleep. Ta Ta for now! --Matilda W

Nothing New

I'm on a mini-vacation right now at my grandparents, so I've had to give my mom updates over the phone. I had root beer float ice cream the other night. It was DE-LISH! Anyway, there was a sweepstakes form on top of the ice cream. You could win a trip to Italy. My grandmom said if she wins the trip to Italy, she would take me with her. I told her to take my grandpop, because I'm not going anywhere where they don't speak English. See ya --Matilda W.

Me, Me, Me, Me, Me, Me, Me

Here's some stuff I want to tell you about myself:

favorite color: Red
favorite animal: dogs (I like my aunt's dog, it is a weiner kind of dog)
favorite food: taco, because I like to put a lot of sour cream on it
favorite tv show: Hannah Montana, iCarly, Arthur, SuperWhy, Wipeout (because I like when people fall off those big red balls)
favorite song: I Gotta Go My Own Way & Fabulous from High School Musical 2
things that make me laugh: when people say toilet words like poop, poopy, and peepee; when I see kids get in trouble with their parents at a store because I'm so glad it's not me, and I especially like when my sister gets in trouble
I love to: dance, blow bubbles, scream, sing, play with my friends
I don't like: my hairy legs, they just aren't ladylike; my hairy arms; boo boos, The Doodlebops, and having to sit in timeout; and most especially, I don't like it when I don't get what I want

I had breakfast at Cracker Barrel today. When you order chocolate milk there, you get your own little carton, like at school. I had two of them. Also, you get your own little bottle of maple syrup. I got in trouble because I took off the lid and drank it like it was a bottle of water. Also, I tried to spread the butter on my pancakes with my finger. My own little finger. Both of my parents were mad.

See ya later. --Matilda W.

Hello!

My name is Matilda, as in Matilda Wormwood from the movie and book Matilda. That isn't my name, but my mom says I have to use it in case weirdos read this. I am 5 years old. My mom is going to type this up and interview me if I run out of things to say. I hope you like it.

Today I found a great website where you can play fun games, oh yeah, and learn some things, too. It's the Sid The Science Kid section of PBSkids.com. Here's the link: http://pbskids.org/sid/index.html

Also, here's my first movie review ever. I watched The Little Mermaid Ariel's Beginning this morning. I want to say that it was really, really good. There were some great songs in it. I got up and danced each time one of the songs came on, so I have to say that it must be pretty good. I plan to watch it, like, a hundred more times.

The only other thing I want to talk about right now is a good drink at Starbucks. It's a smoothie, and I saw the man (well anyway, my mom said it was a man because his name was Ryan but he had a girl's hairdo and looked like a girl) put a banana in it, so I'm pretty sure it is a healthy drink. It was called an Orange Mango Banana Viviano smoothie. They had samples at the supermarket Starbucks, and I took two of them when they weren't looking, so then my mom didn't have to actually buy me a drink.

The typist is getting tired, so we'll talk more tomorrow. Feel free to email me and/or post comments. Keep it clean, I can't read bad words, but my mom sure can --Matilda W.
Technorati Profile